Driving: A Rant

Let me start by saying that I have driven more in the last two months than I have in who knows how long.  So the combination of my not liking driving, not being used to driving, and driving an absurd amount at a price of about $.45 per mile (gasp) has really been “driving” me mad! (Pun intended)
So this is titled “Driving: A Rant” part 1. I am not with holding any pertinent information however considering how much driving I’ve committed to over the next year, I’m confident there will be subsequent parts. 
I am going to touch on mainly two subjects that particularly annoyed me in my drive from Tampa to Ellerslie, Georiga. 

The first thing being the vast majority of people’s inability to merge onto the interstate.  The Makin’ Waves mobile doesn’t typically venture from the right lane so I am almost always dealing with people merging and I think it can be broken down into one of three scenarios.  Scenario one - Person driving down onramp, me in right lane, they are ahead of me.  Scenario two- we are “tied” lets say. Scenario three- I am ahead of the merging car.  In all of these three scenarios there are two appropriate decisions and one that is just so wrong.  So speaking from a statistical standpoint, by employing zero brainpower or decision making skills, you have a 67% chance of making the correct choice.  But that’s with me forgetting to add the idiot factor which is, I’m guessing, a - 68% curve. 
So riddle me this fellow drivers, why on earth are people in scenario one, where they are multiple car lengths ahead of me and driving a far less cumbersome vehicle than I, laying on the brakes as we approach the merge where it is obvious that you are supposed to go ahead of me. Now I have to brake because I am catching up to your stupid braking ass as we’re approaching a point where our two lanes become one and someone has to be in front.  That someone, I assumed, would be you since you are already SO far ahead of me and I don’t slow down nor speed up very quickly! So then you brake more, then I brake more, and the next thing you know we’ve both slowed to like 35 mph and now the only thing I can do is lay on my horn because you deserve it! 

Now let’s skip to scenario three. Dear scenario three driver, did you only read the chapter on scenario one in drivers Ed. and then fall asleep? Because when I’m a quarter mile ahead of you approaching where your lane merges into mine on an interstate with no one else on the road there is absolutely no reason to engage the turbo and blow past me having to drive on the shoulder just so that you didn’t have to… what?... merge in behind me, then pass me in an actual lane like a non-asshole driver?

As for scenario two, either speeding up or braking would solve our impending merge predicament, however it seems that this driver is always on the phone or their own planet and does neither, I guess expecting me to either slow down or speed up, please refer to my vehicles’ aforementioned speeding and braking capabilities.

Well I feel like that was long enough and I’ll save the second subject for its own blog entry, where it belongs.  Stay tuned!
Aloha