So back on Mothers day weekend I was scheduled to do a show in
St Louis called Laumeier that is probably the best show I’ve been accepted into
to date. I was super excited about this
show as I hadn’t had a show in a few weeks between my Florida circuit and that
was to kick off my summer in the Midwest.
I had been watching the weather pretty closely which as it turns out is
never a good thing in the Midwest because to be safe, they always forecast
thunderstorms every single day just to be
safe. Combine that with the fact
that many parts of the Midwest have had the rainiest spring EVER – like more
rain in May than they usually have in the entire year kind of rainiest. Fantastic for art shows right?
Hoorah. So Friday morning I’m scheduled to set up and
it’s pouring down rain so although I think I had already kind of made up my
mind to bail, I finally decided to call and actually tell them I wasn’t coming. They seemed unamused, and I’m pretty sure I
won’t ever get accepted to that show again.
It did rain for all of Friday, and all of Saturday and actually was
decent on Sunday, but rained during breakdown and I heard that getting out of
there was a disaster because it was on a field so no one could drive to their
booth to pick up their stuff. But
despite the weather a friend of mine who did the show did awesome and when he
told me that, plagued me with regret of having bailed, ESPECIALLY after what
the skies had in store for me the next few weekends.
Flash forward to Tulsa,
the weather forecast is looking worse than St Louis did and now I’m here
and I cant bail again!! Plus when Oklahoma has thunderstorms tornadoes always
seem to follow! Just what I need, more tornadoes. If you read my blog about how I was greeted
as I got to OK for the first time last year by a tornado, then.. ya. So these are the two times of which I am to
formulate my opinion of Oklahoma as a whole, last year’s tornado followed by
more rain than Ive ever seen at one time followed by like hundred degree brutal
heat with even hotter, even more brutal, unrelenting wind. So pretty much 360 degrees of everything
shitty about weather all rolled into a few days. Ok, back to 2015, I get to Tulsa, rains Wednesday, rains for
much of Thursday but we actually got to set up in the dry. Then the weather gods seemed to smile on us a
little bit and despite the weather forecast it actually didn’t rain at all the
entire time we were open over the weekend with the exception of a crazy gnarley
storm Saturday night that sent probably an entire foot high of water rushing
through our booth since we were next to the curb. The water was so high that it went over the
curb above the storm drain into the bar!! The water level was so high that it
flooded businesses. I was watching the news and they were playing someone’s
iphone video of the few inches of water in their house and their dog kept
wandering around trying to find a dry place to sit, he was not amused!. And if the nasty, foot high river of street
water rushing through our booth getting literally every single one of my friend’s
200+ t shirts that he had in Rubbermaid containers wasn’t enough, the lightning
did not stop for like 3 hours while I was trying to sleep in my RV as I hoped
that I and every single thing I own in this world, didn’t get swept away in a
tornado. Then once I had somewhat toned
out the lightning and was almost asleep, the tornado sirens started. So for someone who isn’t from Oklahoma, a
tornado in the same state as me is too close, but for people from here
apparently, if its not in your front yard, it doesn’t really matter, and you’d
rather not be bothered with sirens. Me
on the other hand, I’m thinking about how long it’s going to take me to sprint
to the parking garage of my friend’s hotel which I would assumedly be safe in the
case of a tornado. I didn’t have nearly
as good a night as all of the kids who are apparently unphased by tornadoes and
torrential rain and were bar hopping walking through the parking lot I was
parked in.
No significant damage was done to us or our stuff.
Flash forward to next weekend in Oklahoma city. So the whole time I was in Tulsa, everyone
kept saying in regards to the storm, don’t worry, they always hit Oklahoma city
and then die, tornados never hit here, but now I’m supposed to go do the same
thing in the place that is in Tulsa’s opinion, the tornado magnet? The forecast
was not looking good this weekend either, and did not disappoint. With the exception of a brief dry few hours
for set up, it did not stop raining from Friday night until Sunday morning –
literally. With Saturday night having tornado
warnings and actual floods all around the area including between my RV and
anything else, so that was fun. Everything
that I own was wet! Everything!!! Sunday just rained, all day, at one point we all zipped up our tents, sat
inside them and watched the rivers flow through our tents. During these street rivers both Saturday night
and Sunday day, onions from some food truck has washed over and deposited
themselves in every single persons booth among other nasty street food like
what I think to be soggy funnel cake and potato chips. There was an underlying smell of onions that
combined with having to sweep out of my tent nasty soggy probably has been in a
trashcan already grilled onions, I’m pretty sure I cant ever eat onions
again. I had to light a candle in my
booth to get rid of the smell so I didn’t puke all day. I am seriously never eating onions
again. Seriously. Monday morning came and had promised to bring
nicer weather, not when I woke up. It was dreary but was the perfect time to
find someone to tow my RV out of the muddy pit that had become of the grassy
artist parking lot. That was such a fun
experience because my RV was basically facing a building and the tow rope was
like 100 ft long so I basically had to be pulled at probably a 75 degree angle
from what was actually forward for me, as the rope hit trashcans and a
retrofitted schoolbus now used as a art show vehicle trying to get me out of
the mud. There were some pretty substantial tire marks, no, lets call them
holes, there were some pretty substantial holes left in the grass lot.
A few hours later, the sun basically blinded everyone whose
pupils had adjusted to the month of gloom that OK as a whole has been experiencing
for a majority of the midday while we all watched the weather in anticipation
of yet another nasty storm that was brewing in Texas and headed our way. Sure enough, a few hours later the sun was
gone and this time there was actual wind that I was pretty sure was trying to
blow my tent over during break down. Luckily
no damage, but everything that wasn’t yet soggy, got soggy and I drove back to Tulsa
to reunite with the Beanster battling probably 50mph winds that looked like they
were going to blow the trees on the side of the highway straight over. I was greeted by what are arguably the worst
roads in the entire world in Tulsa, if you’ve ever been to Tulsa, you know. It’s
like they intentionally made them this bad, this is no accident, someone is
pissed at Tulsa and taking their anger out on the populous via the road system!
And
now the sun is shining!!! Thanks weather gods, I learned my lesson.
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